Posting jokes

Waffle wolf's picture
"Phil P. Lynott R.I.P. 1949-1985"

Location: IN the moon.

I seen this and i just had to bring it here. I see this on every forum i go to.

How many group posters does it take to change a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

53 to flame the spell checkers

41 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ...

another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim *they* were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

156 to email the participant's ISPs complaining that they are in violation of their "acceptable use policy"

109 to post that this group is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb group

203 to demand that cross posting to hardware forum, off-topic forum, and lightbulb group about changing light bulbs be stopped

111 to defend the posting to this group saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts *are* relevant to this group

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

27 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three"

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again....

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Giza's picture
"100% usynlig - som en ninja!"

Location: Ardmore, PA

Website: [Link]
Blog: [Link]

This user is a Board Member. This user is a Staff Member.

1 to say that it's "URLs" and not "URL's". Smiling

 
--
My LiveJournal - My Website - See what I'm doing on Twitter

naldru's picture
"I fear that financial problems are preventing me from attending this year. Maybe next year."

Location: Philadelphia, PA (USA)

Actually, you forgot the environmental activist posts discussing whether to use florescent or incandescent lights. That's good for three or four flame wars all by itself.

Actually, you got me thinking about light bulb versus lamp. If I purchase a lamp and put it on the table, is the assembly I screw into the lamp also a lamp. How do I distinguish between the two? Do I care about distinguishing between the two?

jovina's picture
Location: Maryland, USA

Website: [Link]

What, no LEDs?

I got into a conversation recently about "lamps" and what it actually means. Actually, a lamp used to be something that you had to put oil into and light it to produce light. Then Edison invented the "electric lamp" which referred to the bulb. Now if a "Lamp" is something that produces light, then the electric bulb or the entire assembly that holds it could be referred to as a lamp. Early cars had "headlamps", "parking lamps" and "tail lamps" which were fueled by oil and/or acetylene. Then cars started going electric and you got "head lights", parking lights", and "tail lights" (along with "stop lights"), and both forms persist to this day... never seen a kerosene fired stop lamp though:).

Jovina

LeonWolf's picture
Location: UK, London

omg you actually made this post even longer and made up another several things to add to the "JOKE!?!?" and now im doing it too ahhhhhhh whats the world coming to...
*breaks down into tears and slams head on table before hitting post comment

Theyain Riyu's picture
"^ This is an eye ^"

Location: In a small little box in your small little mind.

Website: [Link]

I've never seen this before, so I hope its not old

Christmas Carols for the Psychiatrically Challenged

1. Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Queens Disoriented Are
3. Amnesia --- I Don't Know if I'll be Home for Christmas
4. Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and ...
6. Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Full Personality Disorder-- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll tell You Why
9. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder ---Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells ...
10. Agoraphobia --- I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day But Wouldn't Leave My House
11. Senile Dementia --- Walking in a Winter Wonderland Miles From My House in My Slippers and Robe
12. Oppositional Defiant Disorder --- I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus So I Burned Down the House
13. Social Anxiety Disorder --- Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas while I Sit Here and Hyperventilate.

Volknochi's picture
Location: Northern VA

Good one.

McKenzie's picture
"Half Shepherd, half wolf, all anthro"

Location: PA

LOL. good one.

Theyain Riyu's picture
"^ This is an eye ^"

Location: In a small little box in your small little mind.

Website: [Link]

Number 11 actually happened to us the night before last! This old lady just comes into our house (around 2 AM, I'm normally up until 4 AM, and we never lock the doors), bangs on the bedroom door of the guy below me, and just starts talking to him. Before he could call the police, the old lady is gone.

Next morning we get a call from the sherrifs office saying that this old lady with alzheimer's is missing and that she was probably on the road we lived on.

They found her that afternoon in our field, just laying or sitting there.

Yeah, I'm currently sick so sorry if this is coming off as hard to understand.

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